Human Fluency: Authentic Leadership in an AI World
One of the biggest questions leaders are wrestling with right now is this:
How do I stay human, honest, and real as a leader in a world where AI, remote work, and constant noise are the norm?
In a recent conversation on You’re the Boss, Now What, host Desiree Petriq sat down with leadership and HR consultant Nadine Lavigne to talk about a concept she calls human fluency—and how it shapes communication, trust, hiring, remote teams, and even how we use AI.
This isn’t about being perfect, polished, or robotic.
It’s about being human on purpose.
What Is Human Fluency?
Nadine describes human fluency as coming back to real, human language and connection—especially in a world flooded with AI, jargon, and surface-level conversation.
Human fluency is:
- Stripping away the personas and masks we put on at work
- Having deep, real, connecting conversations—not just “business speak”
- Bringing in emotional intelligence (EQ) and self-awareness
- Being willing to say things like “I messed up” or “I got that wrong”
- Staying true to your values while still being professional
It’s not about rejecting AI altogether. Nadine openly says she uses AI and sees value in it. But human fluency is about not outsourcing the human part of leadership:
“Human fluency is just kind of stripping away everything that… business a lot of times makes us put on and just being more real and more human with each other and having very real conversations.”
Authenticity vs. “Sloppy” Leadership
A big fear for many new managers is this:
“If I show vulnerability, will I look weak or lose authority?”
Nadine addresses this directly. She sees a common misconception:
- Some leaders think authenticity means oversharing or being casual to the point of losing professionalism.
- Others worry that explaining their thought process, admitting mistakes, or being open will damage how people see them.
Her take is clear:
- Authenticity is not sloppy.
- Authenticity means aligning your values, your words, and your actions.
- It means listening, learning, and being transparent about why you made the decision you did.
You can be:
- Professional and authentic
- Clear and vulnerable
- Authoritative and open about your reasoning
When leaders explain why they communicated the way they did or chose a certain path, it doesn’t weaken their influence—it strengthens trust.
How Human Fluency Builds Trust on a Team
From the employee’s perspective, there is a massive difference between working for a leader who keeps things surface-level and one who practices human fluency.
When leaders are transparent, candid, and aligned with their values:
- Trust grows.
Team members see a consistent “say-do ratio”—what you say and what you do actually match. - People feel safer to be honest.
When a leader goes first in vulnerability, others feel permission to share mistakes, ideas, gaps, and concerns. - Culture shifts.
The environment changes from guarded and image-focused to more real and connected.
Nadine and Desiree both see this play out during facilitated sessions, team workshops, and “leadership games” where people are asked simple but powerful questions like:
- What are three things you do well?
- What are three things you could work on?
Over and over, leaders walk away saying:
“I’ve never heard any of this before. Why has no one told me?”
The hard truth is often: no one told you because you didn’t clearly show that you wanted to hear it. Human fluency means intentionally creating spaces where people feel safe to say what’s really going on.
A Real Example: When a Leader Realized He Was the Problem
Nadine shared a powerful story from her consulting work with a larger company.
- The leader believed the team’s issues were about them—their communication, their dynamics, their lack of alignment.
- He didn’t think he was part of the problem.
Through a facilitated session focused on safety and openness, the team was given space to speak honestly. As the masks came off, their feedback revealed something important:
- Their biggest struggles were actually around lack of clarity and priorities.
- The leader wasn’t giving them what they needed to succeed.
Sitting in the room, hearing this in real time, the leader had the chance to recognize:
- “I have not been as clear as I should have been.”
- “I haven’t been helping them with priorities the way I thought I had.”
That moment of human fluency—a psychologically safe environment, honest feedback, and a leader willing to hear it—allowed everyone to move forward with more understanding and better behavior.
This is the opposite of artificial harmony: where everything looks fine on the outside, but there’s unspoken frustration bubbling under the surface.
Remote & Distributed Teams: Can You Still Build Real Connection?
Many teams today are remote, hybrid, or spread across locations, regions, or even countries. Desiree asked a critical question:
How do you create authentic connection when you’re not in the same room?
Nadine’s answer:
- You can still create human fluency and psychological safety online.
- It just requires more intentionality.
- Distractions are higher, and it’s easier for people to hide behind a screen—so leaders and facilitators must work harder to create a safe, focused environment.
She’s seen global teams (Canada, Mexico, India, Europe, etc.) build deeper relationships online than colleagues who sit together every day—simply because they were intentional about:
- asking meaningful questions
- creating real conversations
- taking time to know each other as humans
Human fluency is not about physical proximity. It’s about emotional and relational proximity, which can absolutely be built through a screen when guided well.
Trust, Gut Instinct, and Hiring with a Human Lens
The conversation also touched on trust and gut instinct, especially in the context of relationships and hiring.
Desiree shared that she tends to trust quickly and freely—especially with people she meets on LinkedIn—and that this openness has helped her build strong relationships. Nadine resonated with that, adding:
- She relies heavily on her gut.
- Some conversations instantly signal “good person, worth trusting.”
- Other conversations feel off—too salesy, too self-focused, or not fully honest.
She connected this to hiring:
- A perfect résumé doesn’t always mean a great hire.
- In her recruiting days, some of the “best” résumés led to the least impressive conversations and vice versa.
- She even stopped looking at resumes first and started with the person and their stories instead.
Human fluency in hiring means looking beyond polish, credentials, and performance on paper—and tuning into authenticity, values, and how you actually feel in conversation with someone.
Where Does AI Fit? Can AI Help Us Be More Authentic?
One of the most interesting parts of the conversation was this question Desiree asked:
“Do you think there is any way that AI can help us in our desire to become more authentic?”
Nadine’s answer: Yes, it can—if we use it well.
She shared how she has:
- Recorded client conversations
- Fed them into AI
- Asked questions like:
- “Something went wrong here. What could I have done differently?”
- “How could I have listened better?”
- “What other questions should I have asked?”
Leaders who know they struggle with empathy, listening, or certain parts of communication can do something similar:
- Type out how a conversation went with a direct report
- Ask AI where they might have missed an opportunity to listen
- Ask for alternative questions or better ways to respond
AI can:
- Help leaders prepare for difficult conversations
- Suggest better questions
- Provide neutral feedback
- Support self-reflection
But it cannot have the conversation for you.
You still have to:
- show up
- ask the question
- stay present
- own your impact
Desiree added that one of the things she loves about tools like ChatGPT is that you can literally tell it:
“Don’t just be kind—be honest. Be stern with me.”
Where a human might sugarcoat the truth, AI—if prompted correctly—can give direct feedback that helps leaders grow faster.
She even shared that she prepped for this very conversation using AI: taking what Nadine had shared beforehand and asking, “What are the most impactful questions I can ask for my ideal listener?”
Used this way, AI becomes a support tool for deeper, more human conversations—not a replacement for them.
Gratitude and Appreciation: A Critical Piece of Human Fluency
Toward the end, Nadine brought in one more essential ingredient of human fluency: gratitude.
She talks about gratitude every day and sees it as a critical part of being more human and more connected at work.
Gratitude looks like:
- Pausing during your busy day
- Noticing what you’re grateful for
- Remembering who helped you get where you are
And as Desiree added, there’s a second piece: appreciation.
It’s one thing to feel grateful.
It’s another to actually tell people:
- “I’m grateful for you.”
- “You made a difference for me.”
- “You helped me in ways you might not realize.”
That expression of appreciation is what builds trust, connection, and loyalty on a team. It is a direct reflection of human fluency in action.
Final Thoughts: Leadership as a Privilege and a Responsibility
At the end of the conversation, Desiree closed with a reminder for anyone in a leadership role—or anyone aspiring to be in one:
- Leadership is a privilege.
- Leadership is also a really big responsibility.
Human fluency, authenticity, trust, gratitude, and even the way you use AI are all part of that responsibility.
If you’re listening, reading, and doing the work on your personal and leadership development:
👏 You’re already taking that responsibility seriously.
You’re the boss now.
So what are you going to do with it?
